literature

Demon I Have Become

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AngelsWillFallFirst's avatar
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Literature Text

So here I am,
Twisted once again,
Rejecting your honourable intentions,
Locking myself into my grim bastions,
You think that I'm good, tell me I'm sweet, how my heart is pure, but you have no idea what's in there...
Get away from me, this is something I must not share!
Thank God that you can't see,
This darkened side of me,
As I cannot control that part of myself!

Please get away from me,
I do not want you to be around when the animal gets free,
You may not face the creature that I have become!
So please believe,
You will find nothing  else but grief,
And I hope that you will never see,
That this is the real me,
Why don't you listen, you did not hear a single word I said,
Why can't you understand it when I say NO?

I can't fight this fire, I can't fight this fear,
Please, I don't want you to see, my eyes are bleeding,
And I don't want you to see, my soul is burning..
You see me look away, afraid of what it will take,
To not slit your throat when your life's at stake...
You see me run away, its not because I am scared it would hurt it if I killed you,
I AM AFRAID OF FEELING NOTHING!
Because nobody has ever seen the darkened side of me.
Until now, it only happened once that somebody pushed me over the limit and saw my dark side.
He ended up with serious injuries in a hospital.
This was 3 years ago.
I pray it never happens again.
Therefore it is better that people do not get to close.
So they will never know me.
So they will never see this dark side of me.
So I cannot hurt people when I lose control.
Until now it worked, and when this side of me comes out, I have managed to be alone..
I guess thats how it has to be.
© 2009 - 2024 AngelsWillFallFirst
Comments3
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very powerful. did you see red when that happened? that saying is true. there were 2 times when it happened to me and i actually was so pushed past the limit of anger that i literally saw nothing but red before my eyes and i always think that when rage causes violence it must be what happens. kind of like auto pilot kicking in. must be the remnants of survival during cave dwelling days or something. all i know is i sure was strong and there was some hurt done too. i really love your work!